What Moment Will You Cherish?

Saffron Lifestyle Puerto Plata Dominican  Republic

Cherishing My Moments. Because “one day it could be otherwise”.

For the last several days I’ve been in Puerto Plata, Dominican Republic without my family. For someone else that might seem normal enough, but that just means they haven’t met me yet. Traveling? Check! Traveling internationally? Check! Traveling internationally without my husband? That would be an automatic no for me.

However we had an issue with our kids passports; I had no choice. I needed to come and welcome our family and guests, all the while praying hubby could get 24 hour passport renewal without me being in the room. DO NOT…I REPEAT…DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME!!

(I will save the details for another blog once I can find the humor in it. That hasn’t happened yet! But to whet your appetite It includes the following: nine school children who wouldn’t get out of the street, an irate customer care agent who should hand in her resignation NOW, a monsoon, 15 hours of hunger, struggling up a steep cobblestone hill on a golf cart with no windshield through the previously mentioned monsoon, 4 defunct Internet cafes, a lawyer who can no longer hold his own pen but has the notary stamp, holding back the traffic of 489 aggressive motorcycle drivers, to run through the traffic and that blasted monsoon and at least one donkey.)

Now that my family is here I am once again reminded why it’s so important to authentically focus and take time. To slow down and be present. To cherish the moment. To know that: “one day it could all be otherwise”. To learn more about this concept, check out the last episode of, The Sunday Corner™, on YouTube: bit.ly/ChatoneYT

Last night we celebrated with a special dinner. And while this is not a restaurant review it just might make you hungry to visit the DR and come to this fabulous spot.

Travel with me….

We dined at at “Saffron”, a private restaurant here in Puerto Plata. How it lived up to its name!!

Fresh healing herbs infused into every bite. Yes, the food was amazing. Mediterranean hot and spicy lentil and root vegetable soup, smooth hummus and eggplant purée in tiny white bowls served alongside pickled carrots and beets and thick pita bread straight from the oven. The tender roasted lamb chops the size of beef ribs, the chicken tangine arrived at the table atop pearl potatoes, tiny okra and in a sauce with the perfect bite. All of this feast paired with a delectable deep red wine, then finished with crispy phyllo stuffed with apricots and drizzled with warm honey. We were directly at the ocean in a evening so dark, we could hear the surf and waves and the song of night birds, but see nothing. Not even the sand. It was truly a gorgeous experience.

And yet it became pale because I was in the midst of cherishing that my “forever boyfriend” had finally arrived. Mark Morrison is better than the best dinner in the best location in the best part of the most beautiful island. I have cherished him since I was 14 years old. I want to continue.

When you stop to focus and take time, you notice all the tiny hints of moments to cherish and enjoy.

Your turn…

Chatone Morrison ©2017

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Are you a make it happen woman in public, need who is hiding behind a facade of confidence? Could you benefit from support around your mindset, body image, motivation and self-talk in private?  Are you ready to ease your way into releasing your negativity so your positivity can reign?  I’d love to help you up level your game.

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Just DANCE: 5 Tips to Dial Down The Negativity

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Something that is omnipresent in our lives and never seems to go anyplace is negativity.  From children all the way through adulthood negativity breeds like dandelions and there is no fertilizer strong enough to tame it.   External negativity goes through your ears and eyes and straight to your heart.  Worse still is internal negativity.  It causes self-esteem to dip and drop, confidence to stagnate and drown you in the dreaded feelings of “not good enough“.

Does this sound like you?  In the morning, do you jump up ready to go, feeling like a “day slayer” ready to make it happen and then get blindsided by the first person you see outside of your  bedroom with their negative mindset and attitudes?  pablo-varela-311608Or perhaps it happens to you before you even leave the bedroom!  Between the shower, the closet and the vanity mirror, do you sometimes bring the claws out?  Are you your best friend when you start your day?  Or if you were to be judged by the things you say under your breath would someone deem you the enemy?

If you answered yes, should you be alarmed?  Straight talk?  Yes.  At least somewhat.  Since the negativity is alive and well and out of your control from the outside, it is really important that you do what you can to protect yourself on the inside by simply dialing down the negativity.  

Dance Negativity Away

When a dancer is in the zone there is no room for negativity.  The art and practice of moving chases it away.  So how can you embrace some of that for your life?  Can you take up the tango or the waltz?  There is a distinct possibility that might actually work.  But instead of that, try this instead.

  1. Define.  What are the negative dominant thoughts that you experience each day?  If you define and acknowledge them they are easier to compartmentalize.
  2. Abbreviate.  After you define and acknowledge what’s eating at you most, you are at a crossroads.  Will you continue to give these thoughts a home?  Or will you send them packing.  It’s pretty hard to never think something that you have become accustomed to thinking every day.  But can you shorten the time that you allow those thoughts to dominate?  
  3. Nullify Untruth. Did you ever notice that sometimes you are completely lying about what is going on in your life?  Statements like:  “I’m so…” or “I never will…” or “I’m not…”, need to be nullified and neutralized.  Cancel them out before they take root.  They are simply too broadly stroked.  When you find yourself telling lies, just stop.  Not cute!dance 1aricka-lewis-208111
  4. Challenge.  What happens after you nullify the blatant untrue statements but you are still left with a negative ball of threads and you are not sure what to do?  That is when great questions come into play.  Here are a couple I use in coaching:
    •  What evidence do you have to prove this statement?
    • Give 5 examples of when that was true in the past 90 days.
    • Give 5 examples of when that was completely untrue in the past 90 days.
    • Who told you this last?  On a scale of 1-5 with 5 being highest, how does this person rate on the scale of importance with you?
  5. Energize.  The most effective part of Dancing to Dial Down Negativity is the adopt more positive energy.  Doing it alone is extremely difficult.  It takes effort, time, investment and a willingness to switch up the comfort of the uncomfortable.  Reading elevated material, listening to inspirational podcasts,  and changing your tribe all helps.  By far, working with a coach or consultant will quicken the pace of  your transition to releasing your negativity and allowing positivity to reign.  When you are able to actually hear back what you are saying  life changes life changing how differently your words sound when they are repeated back to you.  Like a radio at one time tuned to static, then moved to the right station, suddenly you hear the low energetic vibration, and you want to change it.  That want is facilitated by someone who has your best interests at heart.  david-charles-schuett-363769

Since external negativity has a constant foot in the door, what can you do to limit the time you spend with internal negativity?  Could you dial it back this week? Which of the above 5 resonates enough to make you want to dance?  

Find one.  Put on your favorite tunes.  Kick up your heels.  And dance!

 

 

 

Chatone Morrison ©2017

Are you a make it happen woman in public, in need of support around your mindset, image, motivation and self-talk in private?  Are you ready to ease your way into releasing your negativity so your positivity can reign?  I’d love to support you.  Complete the questionnaire to apply for a free 20-minute strategy session with me. 

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Sarah Cervantes
Pablo Varela
David Charles Schuett

Do You Love The First Day of Summer, Too?

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Going 100 East, Anne Arundel County, Maryland

Today was a near perfect day in Maryland.  The sun has been high and glistening, adding a slight warmth to the skin but not a burn, the occasional wind has rustled the trees in the yard, even the bumblebees hummed a bit louder it seemed.  Well, maybe just to me.  

Yes!  I am that girl.  The year begins and ends for me on the first day of Summer.  I always wished my name was Summer.  There was that one girl I knew growing up and…oops, already digressing away from my point.  THE FIRST DAY OF SUMMER! #FDOS

I can remember staying outside so late and waiting for the sun to finally go down.  It was precious as the pink and amber head of glory slipped behind the range of Orange mountains near my family home in New Jersey.  Shoes were optional, double dutch and hopscotch were desirable and ice-cream from the neighborhood truck “Eskie’s” was mandatory.  

So tonight I grabbed a handful of my best memories to sprinkle on my kids and we rode up the highway, windows down, breezes flowing in, talking and laughing.  As we headed east through the county, the weather threatened disagreement with my plan, and the raindrops began to fall light and steady in nearly transparent sheets, like the beads we hung from our doors to separate us from the outside world and create a false sense of privacy.  The sky behind us was brilliant, gorgeous, shiny and bright.  And I tossed the memory of riding on Route 280 in West Orange, 32 years ago in my red 1978 Ford Pinto, so low to the ground I felt like I need to use my heels to break, like Fred Flintstone.  On that “First Day of Summer”, the sky behind my head was so utterly gorgeous that it nearly devastated me. Literally!  I kept turning around to peek at it.  I was so afraid that I would miss out on its beauty – like it might never happen again.  I stared hard over my right shoulder until I lost my focus and had to drive the rest of the way home with  those huge spots blurring my vision.

Today with the sun and rain coming at the same time, I have the wisdom that keeping my eyes on the road, my heart and mind in the present, and my memories in the past, but close enough to fondle, is the best plan of action. So I kept my eyes straight ahead and bounced my childhood onto my kids in the back seat.  They laughed.  Asked questions.  Were genuinely interested, or at least acted like it.  

Just as the rain stopped, and the sun was beginning to stream through the dark clouds, I reminded them about the wonderful Rainbow promise that God made, and told them to look for the rainbow.  Like clockwork, it appeared (pictured above)  We clapped and snapped and a new #FDOS memory was made.

Special moments surround us every single day.  Many of our great days and best memories are behind us.  The tendency to constantly peep over our shoulders to look for them is strong.  But don’t miss the rainbow looking for the sunshine at your back.  Allow the best parts of your past experiences to warm you, and keep looking forward for the miracles that are waiting.

Happy First Day of Summer!

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Chatone Morrison                   Certified Professional Coach   ChatoneMorrison.com

 

 

 

 

Ready to get your positive energy back in check?  Looking to clean up your self-talk, create a personal affirmation plan or ease your way into releasing your negativity so your positivity can reign?  Complete the questionnaire for a free coaching strategy session.

 

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Is Information Overload Stealing Your Positivity?

IMG_7625Are you simply trying to juggle way too much information? Think of all the blogs, vlogs, Facebook posts, tweets, Instagram and Pinterest pics, Snapchat, Periscopes…the list goes on and on.  It can get to be an over the top habit that moves from serving you to enslaving you. Don’t get me wrong.  I am a lover of knowledge.  I contribute and I consume.  But what happens if you start to feel that you need ALL of it for your success.  How can you know what is for you?

“OK Chatone”, you say.  “We hear you Princess…but what if I need the information for my big idea?  What if I’m building a new brand or company or product and I need to research and figure out what to do to be successful?  What then?”

You are right.  When you researching, learning, and growing into something that you have never been before, knowledge is key.  Bear in mind, though, that all data is not good data.  If you need something very specific, working with a coach…a great coach…is generally where you need to look.  For the last 15 years I have consistently worked with one coach or another and it has helped me to make great strides in grabbing my goals.

However, one of the greatest advantages has been the ability to learn to quickly decipher what information out here is for me and what is not for me.  That level of discernment has served me in such a big way!   You know the feeling of buying the wrong thing on line with all the promises but then nothing happens?  You feel nothing.  You do nothing.  You have no resonation.  No soul-ping at all.  Why?  Because the information did not serve you.  It just seemed like it. For me, working with various coaches helped me to memorize the sound of the ring of truth.  Then it’s easy to buy the right records and sing along.  

What about you?  Still searching and unsure?  Haven’t made the coach/mentor/consultant investment yet?  Well until you do, I’m here to help!  Check out these 5 ways to quickly evaluate information so you don’t have to waste your time or your money!  (See if you can find the poem…)

Is it 100% True?  Pick Good PEARS. Look for Proof, Experience, Authenticity and Realistic.  It should be easy to do this.  But the information out here is in overload format!  And when you want success, there is a fantastic claim about everything ranging  from how to trim fat from a raw chicken to how to trim fat from your thighs!  Tip:  If the information sounds too good to be true, it generally is!

Is it Really For You?  Every Guru isn’t for you.  Every gift is not meant for you to open.  For example, you read about an amazing writing coach who is offering a program.  She has 10 best sellers under her belt and has helped with over 500 clients to become best sellers also.  Wow…she must be for you, right!  No!  Not if you hate writing.  Haven’t read a book in 15 years. And the thought of a bookstore gives you hives.  What excites today will demoralize tomorrow if it’s not for you.  Buyer beware!

Does it Make You Feel Blue?  Great question, right?  Take a good look at who or what you watch the most.  Perhaps it’s a top coach or trainer well renown in his/her professional.  Content is flowing 24/7 and you know they must have what you need…look at their success?!  But do you feel uneasy, annoyed, frustrated afterwards?   Is their mode of motivation positive or do you sense an element of condescension?  We are all gifted with the ability to almost automatically pick up on the energy of others.  We just have the tendency to justify it.  If you want your positivity to show up and stay up – Shift Accordingly!

Would You Share it With Your Crew?  Sharing is an integral part of the fabric of our society.  We specifically share what serves us personally.  Think of the last time you had an amazing dinner at a hidden gem restaurant.  Think about the last motivational book or article that you loved.  Even think about the diet or exercise program that you feel truly served you.  What was the first thing you wanted to do?  SHARE!!  Sharing is the social lifeblood of today’s media. So, if you consistently that you would NEVER share with anyone in your inner circle…simply ask why?

Afterwards Do you Feel Like You Grew?   If you are able to get through the first four “poetry points” you have chosen great content so absorb on!  Right?  Well…there’s just one more thing.  Let’s bottom line all of this.  Growth is the key reason for taking in information. We are growing or dying.  It’s that simple.  Without it you might as well just  sit on the couch and look out of the window instead of expending the mental energy needed to examine and apply the content that you have chosen.  So pick morphy material!  If the material is stagnant and can never be applied to anything new or is the same old, same old don’t expect anything to change.  

Chances are, the volume will only increase.  But equipped with these 5 steps you can turn up exactly what you want to hear and mute the rest.  Be well!

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Summer Positive Vibes

Ready to get your positive energy back in check?  Looking to grow or do something you haven’t done in a long time?  Complete the questionnaire for a free coaching strategy session.

 

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It’s Spring…But What Season Are You In?

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Here in Columbia, Maryland it’s Spring.  And although we have had a mixture of cool, rainy days with unseasonably warm days, it’s still Spring.  The trees are full, green and lovely.  Big, juicy flowers line the lawns in my neighborhood.  More animals than I care to count are visiting my backyard.  Mulch is being freshened up.  Folks are getting into the swing of running again, the bikers are getting their legs back and kids are playing outside.  Life is being lived full and out loud and pleasant.  Everything is getting renewed.  Spring is the renewal season.  It starts to seem easy to get started because things are blooming.  It’s a good time!

What about you?  What in your life is being renewed right now?  Are you starting to hear the click-clack of regularity in your fitness?  Your business?  Your relationships?  Are you writing a book and feeling amazing because the chapters seem to be rolling off your pen and onto the page?  Are you reaching your fitness and clean eating goals?  Ain’t it grand?  It is!  So what’s wrong?

What’s wrong is that you might still be in Winter.  In Winter we are not ready to spring.  It’s that simple.  Winter is for Wonder.  The wonder season where one explores, imagines, figures it out and finally pinpoints what next step to execute.  Incredibly encouraging if your goal is to actuate your success.  Incredibly discouraging if you end up comparing yourself to someone else’s success.

Stop it!!  It’s not Spring for you!  You are in the Wonder season and your personal Spring is coming once you stop comparing yourself to other people.

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Imagine a snowflake comparing itself to a lily.  Both white.  Both unique.  Both on the ground.  Both beautiful.  And yet completely…COMPLETELY different.  And Not to be compared.

“But Chatone, I’m not where I want to be yet!  I’m tired of working so hard and not getting anywhere!”

How true is that?

If you have a fear of heights, but want to feel the exhilaration of going down the expert slope, you have to conquer the monorail.  You have go slowly up…there is no way to get down until you get up.  So go.  Slowly if that is what it takes.  Look around.  Wonder at the beauty of the mountain on the way up.  Then get ready to scream at the top of your lungs in joy on the way down!  Success is everywhere…you just have to change up your perspective.

If you want your “Positivity to Reign”, STOP comparing yourself to anyone else.  You cannot walk in their shoes, sing with their voice, dance with their hips, jump with their rope.  If Spring has not yet arrived at your house, look at the beauty of the snow.  Go skiing.  Go sledding. Go iceskating.  Embrace the season you are in!  Focus on what’s good and take time to enjoy it all.  Your Spring-into-Action is on it’s way!

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“Princess of Positivity” Enjoying a Quiet Moment in NYC

Would you like support to get your thinking right so you can spring into your next big thing?  Let me help.  Fill out my questionnaire to work with Chatone and request a FREE coaching strategy session.

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Where Poetry Resides – Truth Is

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Poetry is positivity at the deepest and most soulful level.  The saddest phrases.  The angriest lines.  The bloodiest verse.  All these take the human spirit down to the core.  Down to the bone.  Down to the honesty.  And in the sphere of honesty is where the positivity always lies.  Write even the shortest poem and trust that where you need to be, and where you want to go will appear.  Almost magically.   It’s no longer about just the facts: where poetry resides – truth is. Continue reading

Getting There Without Getting Stuck

When is the last time you got Stuck?  It’s a yucky feeling, right?  Trust me, I’ve been there!  There are many reasons for getting Stuck.  Unfortunately it’s a real place.   An actual location on the map, and for one reason or another, our internal GPS thinks Stuck is true North.  There are no road signs or mile markers showing that you are approaching “Stucksville” (borrowed from my Daddy, the late, great Linwood Curley.)  It’s hidden between the crevices of our busy-ness, uncertainty and confusion.  Stuck is where we end up getting, when “There” is elusive.  So where is “There”? 

  1. Where do you want to go?  You have to set your destination with intention, if you want to avoid getting get Stuck.  Is it a promotion at work?  A new level in your MLM business?  Is it a different dress size or a completed marathon?  Are you after a more peaceful relationship with your teenage son or middle school daughter?  Would you like to write a book or start a blog or create a painting?  Does getting along with your elderly mom resonate with you?  Or do you see yourself getting your financial future in order?  Where are you wanting to go?  The destination is not the point.  You get permission to set that.  So take a few days and set a goal to where you want to be.  Because where is never the issue.  It’s in the why and how that Stuck takes over.
  2. Why is this important?  Why is always a toughie.  Why questions you and wants to know right away.  Why shows you absolutely no mercy.  and when you cannot figure out your Why in any and every given situation, Stuck is sure to ensue.  Why?  (See, I’m not even kidding on this!)  Because without the answer of Why there is no drive.  No motive.  No fire.  No energy.  And absolutely No Positivity.  It’s as if a “No Trespassing” sign were nailed over the destination to your goal.  Even if you attempt to tread lightly in the direction of your goal, without the answer to Why…you will very likely call the cops on your very own self.  You won’t believe you belong there, so you arrest yourself.  Yep, it’s not a pretty sight.  Imagine you holding yourself with your hands behind your back…Miranda rights being read…head bowed as you get in the police car and get dragged further and further away from your dreams.  Just figure this one out and you will spare yourself this dramatic scene.  Now all you have to think about is How – and that is the easiest one of all!
  3. How are you getting there?  OK, so I was teasing just a bit.  How has its challenges but nothing like Why.  How is challenging simply because there are so many different ways to do what you want.  And if you have already struggled with Why, chances are the How you will reach your destination without getting Stuck is going to take time.  The funny thing is, no matter what the sense of urgency is, time is never really an issue.  In this day and time we are beings that rush.  We are working to cram as much life in as we can.  Period.  So the best scenario is to take the needed time (not too much time, lest Stuck make an ugly appearance) and make the best decisions you can.  Want to lose weight?  How does it make you feel to work alone?  Would a food or health coach make sense?  Do you like groups?  How do you feel about the gym?  Would you prefer to run on the street or the treadmill?  How do you feel about trainers?  Get what I’m saying?  Each of these choices will most likely get you to your destination.  Taking the time to determine in positivity how you will get there, is a cornerstone to  arriving with minimal detours, roadblock, u-turns and avoiding “Stucksville”.  

What NOT To Do

  1. Get overly busy.  
  2. Belittle yourself.
  3. Forget to sew into self-worth.  
  4. Take action without thought or based on someone else’s agenda.

What TO Do

  1. Program your GPS Where you want to go according to your highest intentions.
  2. Discover your Why.  
  3. Examine How you want to get there.
  4. Pick only one mode of transportation at a time.

Along your many journeys and adventures this year, don’t visit Stucksville.  Instead grab your most colorful push-pins and put them into the Destination of your Dreams and enjoy the ride!

Chatone Morrison – 2/13/17

 

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Excuse Me…May I Offer You A Hankie? Three Tips to Squash the Common Cough.

hankieStrange question indeed.  But everyday we encounter people that need a hankie.  The back of their hand.  The crook of their arm.  A napkin.  A tissue.  A turn of the head.  Anything to assist them from coughing all over you.  You know what I’m saying!  You’ve been the victim probably in the last few hours of someone coughing in your direction, not turning their head, ignoring the sputum that is dropping everywhere!tissues

Negative, emotional coughing, is just as contagious as an actual virus.  It’s prevalent to epidemic proportions.  In the family it starts as young as early school age children.  The negative energy is flowing and causing stagnation in ever area of our lives.  It’s as hard to combat as a super bug.  And just like those bugs, there are few if any external medicines that will do the ultimate trick.  The prescription is usually something like:  Rest.  Fluids.  Disinfect your environment so you don’t contaminate the family.

Do the same principles apply when someone has a chronic cough?  A super bug of the spirit?  Is there a way to avoid catching the epidemic?!

The good news?  Yes!  You absolutely can.  The other good news?  It’s the same formula as for a regular cough.  But be careful . . . Chronic Coughers are not easily shaken!

Three Tips To Squash The Common Cough

  1. Take a Break.  stopIf you are constantly bombarded with the negative drama of others, their sad stories, their woe-is-me existence, or their tales of victimization you will eventually catch the Common Cough.  So take a break.  It’s easy to see who these folks are in your life; when you see their name on your phone or email, a little sigh escapes your lips.  That “sigh” is your sign!  Give yourself permission to limit time with this individual.  Sometimes you know how much you immunity can take, and other times you don’t know until you get home and you are coughing too!  So instead of that, make a decision to honor your boundaries.  You deserve to be in the best health possible.  (In another blog or video I will jump into what happens when the cough resides in the house with you!  Stayed Tuned!!)
  2. Fluids.  Fluids lubricate the system.  Fluids assist things to get and stay moving.  Instead of the dryness of the throat, just a little fluid eases everything.  The same is true in dealing with emotionally negative people.  The fluid that is most readily available, but sometimes hard to muster is kindness, love, and understanding, and this takes time.  Wait!  Doesn’t that contradict “taking a break”? fluids Not exactly.  If you want to have the most positive experience possible, there has to be a fair amount of “benefit of the doubt”.  Everyone deserves that.  In practical terms this means you might have infrequent but kind communications with this person.  Especially in the workplace or in closer relationships.  Would it really hurt to acknowledge this person, perhaps offering them a listening ear every now and again?  Could you offer them a hankie?  Perhaps having a good word for them?  Even though it may not seem to make a dent, it will make a difference.  If not for them, it will for you.  If will create an ease based on putting someone else first, even just for a little while.
  3. Disinfect the Environment. There is a really good reason why frequent hand washing is recommended when we are sick.  It prevents that spread of germs.  Does this hold true with negative, emotional coughing too?  Yes!  lysolTo help protect yourself from catching the cough, simply clean up!  Don’t leave the negativity to fester in your mind.  Replace it with positive recordings.  Read books that build.  Post affirmations in your surroundings.  Use uplifting music to tune it out.  Light a candle.  Burn some incense.  Spritz essential oils.  Journal.  All of these are like disinfectants for the mind.  Protect yourself and prevent the spread of negative energy!

Keeping a positive healthy mind is pretty easy.  With awareness and a few quick strategies you can steer clear of the Common Cough.

Chatone Morrison – 1/17/17

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Four Ways to Know You Have Fallen And Can’t Get Up & What To Do About It

screen-shot-2017-01-10-at-2-20-45-amWhat is UP for you?  For me UP is Unapologetic and Positive.  Does it seem like you have fallen and can’t get UP?  

Is the house too loud?  Does the cellphone never stop ringing?  Is your work cafeteria lady against you, only giving you the heel of the bread?  Then after you get the butts of the bread, are there  no empty tables for you?  Perhaps you are married.    You have three children.  But are there also 8 neighbors, 5 sisters, 4 parents, two cats, 1 dog, and about 67 people at work, that all need you?  Seems like you are surrounded; like “come out with you hands up, and we won’t shoot”, surrounded. Your answer is yes…always yes.  And you wake feeling burnt out and tired more often than ever before.  You would love to have just a little quiet.  But it seems to come less and less frequently.  Yikes!!!

How does a woman today navigate all the required highways still stay relatively sane and in her positive right mind?  Who reprogrammed the GPS so that it started driving you down instead of UP?  

The simple answer my friend…you did!  You did it in the name of progress.  Of love.  Of caring.  Of doing.  And now you are stuck in a negative rut.  But not to worry, I just might have a teeny tiny plan that you can implement today.  As in right now.  Right this very minute.  Why be stuck in the name of progress?

Our activities and choices  used to be like painting a wall.  You would look at paint chips, take them home, put them on the wall to try them out, then pick the one that was best suited for your room.  You threw out the rest because they didn’t fit.  You might have liked them but you made a best choice decision.  Now it seems that the way to “paint a life” is to throw various paints from a distance on a small wall, during a drive by, and then get surprised and dismayed when a masterpiece doesn’t appear.  

It doesn’t work. Women can’t do it all and feel 100% happy.  We can’t outsource it all and feel 100% connected.  We all want to feel positive and determined about the decisions we are currently making and living, yet we continue to fall, get stuck and can’t get UP!

But I’m not stuck!  I’m haven’t been in a rut since I had that bob cut with bangs!  Not me!  I’m great!  

Is that the best way to handle this?  Don’t get me wrong, I’m all about positive thinking.  But if it’s based on nothing but a list of lose ideas grabbed from someone else’s playbook – it won’t work!

How to Know If You Have “Fallen and Can’t Get UP?

No matter what your social media pictures and posts say, it’s time to face the truth.  Let’s get you crawling, walking and finally running, all int he next few weeks!  Ready.  Get Set.  Go!

Self-Assessment

  1. Do you feel an overall loss of energy or enthusiasm about work or home life?  Especially things that you use to enjoy?
  2. Do you often feel as if you are losing control when trying to get everything done?
  3. Has negative thinking or self-demeaning thoughts become commonplace?
  4. Are you demotivated to eat right, exercise, take care of basic necessities?

Which of these resonates with you?  Even just one can indicate that you may be about to hit the floor.  

Creating An Action Plan

  1. Isolate and Identify The Problem.  Where are the demands coming from?  Is it work or home?  Is it your spouse or your kids?  Is it your weight or your health? (Notice that these are different!)  Which weighs heaviest on your energy? Make a short list, no more than 3 items to start.  More than that will cause great overwhelm.  You can always  come back and do this step again.
  2. Seek Clarity & Seek Solutions.  You have your list in hand and it’s time to get clear on what and how you want to change.  Working with a coach at this point is excellent because as a neutral 3rd party they are invested in your success, not in the specific way you get there.  (For information about working with a coach, see my website:  chatonemorrison.com)  Not yet ready to work with a coach? Creating a vision board (poster board, pictures/words from magazines, glue stick are all you need) can help with steps 1 and 2  at the same time. Sometimes with so much crowding you need to allow a space for your mind to get clear and feel free.  While moving to a deserted island by yourself with no one but a personal concierge to bring you Mai Tais all day and night, while you seek clarity, probably isn’t an option, I’d bet a 2-hour window to play “hide and seek” with  yourself is quite doable. Never created one before?  Hit me up in the comments below and I can give you some quick suggestions.
  3. P.S:  Make One “PDC” Each Day.  Your quest for “Personal Space” and “Personal Slow-Down” will take time.  So along the way it’s vital to have a daily “PDC”.  Permission Driven Choices are an amazing way to start feeling whole again. It could be as small as getting the cup of coffee you want and taking 5 minutes to drink it while looking out the window.  It could be leaving your office and sitting outside in your car and screaming away the stress…although make sure you don’t park too close to the building if you choose that one!  Back in the day when I was still at my corporate job, one of my PDCs was to simply stop “holding it”.  TMI…but true!  The point is to do one thing each and every day, that was formerly off limits.  Try it for a week.  Get your Power Back!
  4. Just Ask & Saying No.  As soon as you read this, think about something you want.  What would you love help with?  If you assertiveness volume was turned all the way up, what could you say?  Just Ask.  Say No. Do it.  No holding back.  Not ready to tell your boss to take his last minute deadline and throw it where the sun don’t shine? (I would not recommend; neither the most positive nor motivating thing to do!)  But could you ask for an extension?  Being asked again to be the only chaperone for the class trip, to make the cupcakes or be the pot luck coordinator for the next family get together, and also by the way, have it at your house?! Wrap your tongue around Saying No!  I guarantee if said with a twinkle in your eye and just the right amount of lift in your voice, 9 times out of 10, your assertiveness will be met with respect.  The best part is you get to feel  better… Quick!

The earth spins and so do our worlds.  Just like we cannot jump off the Earth, we also cannot slow everything down to suit our needs.  But you can start to reset your GPS to take short cuts and avoid traffic patterns that are roadblocks to your destination – POSITIVITY!

Chatone Morrison – 1/10/2017

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What Do You Need…A Dollar or A Dream?

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“The poorest person is not one without a dollar, but one without a dream.”

This quote is often posted on Facebook and Twitter and yet it resonates deeply each and every time.  It’s not surprising.  Whether one lives in poverty or the penthouse, is a front office clerk, or corner office CEO, when dreams, aspirations, and visions reside within, there is energy for another day.  The simple truth is, the human happiness quotient is not based on outside things.  It is based on what is within.

The biggest challenge is not dream development or creation.  It’s keeping them alive when the light above them dims.  It’s remembering to take them out for intimate dates, even after being married to them for 20 years.  And as the quote insinuates, it’s in making sure that other goals don’t replace what’s really important.  Sometimes, our dreams don’t need more money – they need a place to lay their tired heads.

It’s true that some of our more “creative” ideas may have an expiration date based on timing or circumstances.  You may not be able to join the circus at 39 years old and perform as a trapeze artist,  but can you go to a TRX or Pilates class and learn to strength train while suspended – closing your eyes and imagining yourself in the big tent?  In other words, if you hold your dream tightly enough, and know the intrinsic worth for you alone, you will find a way to make the essence of it a reality.

The chances of me becoming a professional dancer now are slim, but no holds barre (pun intended), I am great and graceful when I’m in cardio dance classes…(well, theoretically…when my ankle is not swollen!)  For an hour I compassionately stroke the head of that tiny farfetched dream.  And guess what?  My positivity, energy, and happiness are always higher than before I started.

If you can make authenticity boil over, it is multi-faceted, brilliant, and far more valuable than the world’s most expensive diamond.

Ready to reinvigorate your dreams? Read on!

Discovery:

  • What dream of mine keeps coming back year after year?
  • What am I doing with it?
  • If I’m not doing enough, what can I do to inch toward that part of myself?
  • What’s the best thing that can happen if I simply go for it?
  • Why am I waiting?

No matter how thin or worn or frayed the edges become, put your dream in your pocket or your purse.  Sling it over your shoulder and carry at least one with you at all times.  Be open to taking it out and showing it off, like you would a picture of your daughter or son, or kitty or pup.  Don’t hide it and don’t run from it.  Remember, your dreams are not going anywhere.  Where ever you go, there they are, patiently waiting for you to take them out for a spin.

Don’t worry about the dollar – JUST DREAM!

Chatone Morrison – 11/24/2016

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