Just DANCE: 5 Tips to Dial Down The Negativity

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Something that is omnipresent in our lives and never seems to go anyplace is negativity.  From children all the way through adulthood negativity breeds like dandelions and there is no fertilizer strong enough to tame it.   External negativity goes through your ears and eyes and straight to your heart.  Worse still is internal negativity.  It causes self-esteem to dip and drop, confidence to stagnate and drown you in the dreaded feelings of “not good enough“.

Does this sound like you?  In the morning, do you jump up ready to go, feeling like a “day slayer” ready to make it happen and then get blindsided by the first person you see outside of your  bedroom with their negative mindset and attitudes?  pablo-varela-311608Or perhaps it happens to you before you even leave the bedroom!  Between the shower, the closet and the vanity mirror, do you sometimes bring the claws out?  Are you your best friend when you start your day?  Or if you were to be judged by the things you say under your breath would someone deem you the enemy?

If you answered yes, should you be alarmed?  Straight talk?  Yes.  At least somewhat.  Since the negativity is alive and well and out of your control from the outside, it is really important that you do what you can to protect yourself on the inside by simply dialing down the negativity.  

Dance Negativity Away

When a dancer is in the zone there is no room for negativity.  The art and practice of moving chases it away.  So how can you embrace some of that for your life?  Can you take up the tango or the waltz?  There is a distinct possibility that might actually work.  But instead of that, try this instead.

  1. Define.  What are the negative dominant thoughts that you experience each day?  If you define and acknowledge them they are easier to compartmentalize.
  2. Abbreviate.  After you define and acknowledge what’s eating at you most, you are at a crossroads.  Will you continue to give these thoughts a home?  Or will you send them packing.  It’s pretty hard to never think something that you have become accustomed to thinking every day.  But can you shorten the time that you allow those thoughts to dominate?  
  3. Nullify Untruth. Did you ever notice that sometimes you are completely lying about what is going on in your life?  Statements like:  “I’m so…” or “I never will…” or “I’m not…”, need to be nullified and neutralized.  Cancel them out before they take root.  They are simply too broadly stroked.  When you find yourself telling lies, just stop.  Not cute!dance 1aricka-lewis-208111
  4. Challenge.  What happens after you nullify the blatant untrue statements but you are still left with a negative ball of threads and you are not sure what to do?  That is when great questions come into play.  Here are a couple I use in coaching:
    •  What evidence do you have to prove this statement?
    • Give 5 examples of when that was true in the past 90 days.
    • Give 5 examples of when that was completely untrue in the past 90 days.
    • Who told you this last?  On a scale of 1-5 with 5 being highest, how does this person rate on the scale of importance with you?
  5. Energize.  The most effective part of Dancing to Dial Down Negativity is the adopt more positive energy.  Doing it alone is extremely difficult.  It takes effort, time, investment and a willingness to switch up the comfort of the uncomfortable.  Reading elevated material, listening to inspirational podcasts,  and changing your tribe all helps.  By far, working with a coach or consultant will quicken the pace of  your transition to releasing your negativity and allowing positivity to reign.  When you are able to actually hear back what you are saying  life changes life changing how differently your words sound when they are repeated back to you.  Like a radio at one time tuned to static, then moved to the right station, suddenly you hear the low energetic vibration, and you want to change it.  That want is facilitated by someone who has your best interests at heart.  david-charles-schuett-363769

Since external negativity has a constant foot in the door, what can you do to limit the time you spend with internal negativity?  Could you dial it back this week? Which of the above 5 resonates enough to make you want to dance?  

Find one.  Put on your favorite tunes.  Kick up your heels.  And dance!

 

 

 

Chatone Morrison ©2017

Are you a make it happen woman in public, in need of support around your mindset, image, motivation and self-talk in private?  Are you ready to ease your way into releasing your negativity so your positivity can reign?  I’d love to support you.  Complete the questionnaire to apply for a free 20-minute strategy session with me. 

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For More on This Topic – Catch the Latest Episode of The Sunday Corner© Show on YouTube:  

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Sarah Cervantes
Pablo Varela
David Charles Schuett

Nothing Compares To You

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NOTHING COMPARES TO YOU…BELIEVE IT!

When is the last time you felt that nothing compared to you?  You know that feeling when you are “sitting pretty” without even trying?  When you are in the midst of the best you, doing the things that make you feel great from the inside out?  If it has been a while, this blog is just for you.  If you can’t remember when,  you may have fallen victim to someone else’s hype. If you can’t remember,  it’s  been way too long.  

Guess what?   Contrary  to popular belief…nothing compares to you.   It wouldn’t sting so badly if this statement weren’t true.  But it is true.  Your specialness precedes you, even when you don’t see it.

Why You Don’t See It

You don’t see where you don’t look.  As women we are oftentimes looking for the good in everyone around us.  It becomes our singular job to uplift, empower, encourage and nurture.  The family, the job, the school, where we volunteer, all get our best.  They may or may not give us compensatory thanks.  We are literally living our specialness and giving it away simultaneously, so much so that we personally miss it altogether.  Search.  Look deeper.  It’s still there.

You Have A Distorted Mirrorbubble reflection sebastian-pichler-20071

Your standards of  “best you” are not quite right.  you using to compare your Have you ever looked in a old,  cloudy or cracked mirror?  How did you look?  Even if you could make out all your features, would you trust that mirror to put on your makeup?  Do your hair for an evening out?  Dress yourself?  What might the chances be for you to make an error in judgement and totally miss it?  Fairly high, right?  

How often are your standards set by you instead of strangers?   When an important path is set by someone who doesn’t know how unique and lovely you are, you will never feel that you measure up.  Period.  Take a look at your mirror.  If it can be cleaned up, do it.  If it needs replacing, throw it away and start again.

La, La, La…I Can’t Hear You!

Sound like a child you know?  This is a fan favorite with small children.  They tune out cellphone-andrik-langfield-petrides-348253what they don’t want to hear.  Have you taken on this childlike behavior?  Is it wrecking havoc on your self-esteem and confidence?  You can get so busy hearing what people you don’t know are whispering to you that you don’t hear what those who know and love you are screaming.  This social media monster is in a constant chase for our hearts.  It’s a necessary evil that can replace the human interaction in our lives if we let it.  Next stop?  No longer listening to important people who know you, love you, understand where you have been and where you are going.  Hand over ears and eyes, you make others out to be wrong; no longer believing the truth.  It’s gradual and insidious and happens way too often! It’s annoying when kids do it.  (Newsflash:  It’s annoying when adults do it too!)

What Can You Do?

  1. If you nurture others; nurture yourself too.  Give away some of your best self, and keep some for yourself.  It’s easier said than done, so practice is needed.  
  2. Take a good look at your mirror.  If the standards you are working with no longer fit you make a change.  Evolve them. Remove them.  You will not stay the same woman, especially as you gain more life experience (age/wisdom, etc).  Expect the metamorphosis and accept it for what it is . . . Something Wonderful. 
  3. Unless you are a very tall, feathery and fast bird running on the plain, you can no longer use ostrich-like habits to excuse away who you are.  Rejecting reality does not change it.  When others acknowledge you, it is a blessing.  Develop your listening and appreciation skills.  Very few people have the desire to flatter you for no reason.  Listen.  You just might hear something great.

The late artist Prince said it best:  Nothing compares to you.   However, if you don’t allow yourself to go to your own party, the party will go on without you.  Since it’s being thrown in your honor, you might as well enjoy it.  

Chatone Morrison ©2017

Are you a make it happen woman in public, in need of support around your mindset, image, motivation and self-talk in private?  Are you ready to ease your way into releasing your negativity so your positivity can reign?  I’d love to support you.  Complete the questionnaire to apply for a free 20-minute strategy session with me. 

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Don’t Miss The Latest Episode of The Sunday Corner Show on YouTube:  

Visit The Sunday Corner Here

Social Media

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Coaching Website:  ChatoneMorrison.com

Facebook:

@chatonemorrisonconsulting

@princessofpositivity

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Are You Setting Your Fire With Wet Wood?

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Do you have an autumn ritual?  Something that automatically makes your mind turn to red and gold leaves and the shedding of trees?  For our family that means camping.  Although  we won’t be able to fit it into our October schedule, we will no doubt spend time on our patio, enjoying a crisp, dusky evening, making s’mores around the fire pit, telling stories, watching the release of the beautiful, glowing energy.

Speaking of stories, which ones have you been telling yourself lately?  What renewal are you in the process of experiencing?  As I mentioned the other day in a blog post here, this time of year has become the new starting point for so many folks.  Autumn truly is the “New Black”.  For me, it’s all about writing more, meeting new people in both my coaching and Mary Kay business, and working a revised, more robust schedule for my Deaf ministry.   bulb idea riccardo-annandale-140624

Each of us has the unique privilege of having a dream, an idea, a mission, some specialness that we want to bring to fruition.  To do it well, you need to ignite a “fire” in your spirit to make it happen.  And no matter how excited you might be about your big idea, without the elements of fire behind you to make it happen, well it won’t happen.

Setting fire to your idea, your dream without the strength of the right elements is like setting a fire with wet wood.  It will smolder and smoke, but never get to a full burn.  The right stuff is missing; the dampness is killing the energy!   But how can you know what the right stuff is, and how do you get it?

In many ways it’s simple.  It’s all about strength.  The cool thing about this strength is that you can adopt it.  Grow it.  Develop it.  Evolve into it.  It’s not about pushing or prodding.  It’s about asking the right questions.fire timothy-meinberg-206976

My specialty is about helping women ask the right questions of themselves so they can learn how to release negativity, let positivity reign, and set a fire within to get things moving in the right direction.  Is that your journey?  Are you ready to start?  Be sure to check out this past week’s Sunday Corner™ video.  You can get so much done when you turn up your flame!

Chatone Morrison ©2017

Ready to get your positive energy in check?  Looking to clean up your self-talk, create a personal affirmation plan or ease your way into releasing your negativity so your positivity can reign?  Complete the questionnaire for a free coaching strategy session.

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Don’t Miss The Weekly Sunday Corner Show on YouTube:  Bit.ly/ChatoneYT

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Coaching Website:  ChatoneMorrison.com

Facebook:

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@princessofpositivity

@chatonemorrisonMK

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Interested in starting your own business?  Let’s set up a marketing chat. chatonemorrison@marykay.com

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Vision Through Any Size Window

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Photo by Lian Jonkman on Unsplash

For many of us, Vision is a strength.  We see with wide eyes.  Positive eyes.  For others vision is a struggle because distractions of other people’s views get in the way.  How about you? How is your vision?

One of the reasons I love coaching and being coached, is the way it opens eyes.  Eyes without possibility suddenly see (pun intended) what could be.   So many times, right up until the time when you are ready to hit “Go”, vision is in place.  You are flying a private jet.  The view is wide open, the window is huge and clear.  Then one thing or another happens.  Clouded by fear, indecision or feeling cramped by too many other opinions, even if it’s the last thing you want to happen, the window shrinks and vision fades.

The irony is when starting something new, vision is possible through any size window.  Even when no one can see our big idea, it’s clear to us.  Adversity and fear shrinks the window.  As the size of the window shrinks, so does the vision.  In reality, if you have the nerve to start scared, but invincible you can finish the same way.   Here’s two quick ways to do it:

  1.  Find your tribe!  Who is your tribe?  Like-minded, similarly focused folks who “get you”.  It doesn’t mean they are into the exact same thing necessarily.  It just means they will allow you to have your vision.  They will refuse to allow you to shrink because the target is far away.  In the picture above the window is small.  Seeing anything is going to be hard.  But the realities outside are exactly the same size!  So find a tribe who will keep you accountable for looking straight ahead even when the distance between you and your goal is still far away.
  2. Be Authentic!  This is more than just a Princess of Positivity® platitude.  Being Authentic is real and it will keep your vision alive!  Along the way to reach what you want so much fear is involved. Couple that with the naysayers and dream-slayers, and the tendency to say everything is, “Fine” is simply to tempting and seems harmless.  Of course nothing could be farther from true.   It will keep you from moving forward.  Because when you lie about your progress, or tell the truth about your progress, and then lie about how you feel about it, your tribe cannot help you.  They won’t even know you need it.

If you are wanting a stronger and more positive vision, you can also write down your vision statement, keep it with you and recite it repeatedly until you are comfortable.  Or you can make a vision board and interact with it until you embrace it as truth.   It might take a moment to change your mindset, but once you do, you get to play a bigger game with your ultimate vision.  Deciding is more than half the battle!

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Photo by Izzy Gerosa on Unsplash

Any Size Window – Poetry By Chatone Morrison

Super big vision.
Big ideas. Yet,
Packing big suitcases. 
Full of fear.

 

Shaking head silence.
Choices are few.
Thoughts seem distant, old and un-new.  

Shake them off?  

Pretend them away?  
Face them head on or they stay and stay and stay.
Where is the vision?  
Where did it go?  
Brought down with arrows, night clubs and bows? 
When with-in seems empty, and with-out is a shame.
When you give up or give out just “I” will be blamed.
When Perseverance is a memory of your distant days
Packed in the cases of your younger self’s ways
Go in again with
A different approach. 
Go in again with
A brand new way.
Step out on the field. 
And into the sun. 
Go for the run where giants play. 
Your vision is present
On the field and on the plane.  
Fear is a friend
A guidepost to glow.
You are more than enough
To play a huge game
And your vision is clear through any size window.

 

Chatone Morrison ©2017

Ready to get your positive energy in check?  Looking to clean up your self-talk, create a personal affirmation plan or ease your way into releasing your negativity so your positivity can reign?  Complete the questionnaire for a free coaching strategy session.

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Don’t Miss The Weekly Sunday Corner Show on YouTube:  Bit.ly/ChatoneYT

Social Media

https://linktr.ee/realprincessofpositivity

Coaching Website:  ChatoneMorrison.com

Facebook:

@chatonemorrisonconsulting

@princessofpositivity

@chatonemorrisonMK

Instagram:  @realprincessofpositivity

Periscope/Pinterest/Twitter:  ChatoneMorrison

Interested in starting your own business?  Let’s set up a marketing chat. chatonemorrison@marykay.com

All photos courtesy of Unsplash.com