Take 5! How To Make A Good Day Great Without Even Trying

 

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I’m happier when I take a few moments to focus on what’s good.

For the last few years I have been taking a moment to focus on something really small and really good every day. Yesterday this photo was taken during one of these moments. 

It’s more than just gratitude. Acknowledging the good stuff, however minor, and being thankful is an energy changer.  A mindset shifter.

In 2012 hubby and I decided it made sense for me to leave Corporate HR and Training communications behind. It was the right decision but the shift in routine and a series of illnesses threw me for a loop. Anything like that ever happen to you?  I was accustomed to feeling great and serving others and feeling relatively happy, then suddenly it was all gone. Even though I was busy concentrating on getting well, it was almost unbearable.  I had to think of something. Scaling back from trying to find my perfect life and instead working to embrace the present was a much better choice.

A little later I started keeping a list of 5 things each day that I loved or experienced or appreciated or enjoyed. The rule I set was I couldn’t make the list in advance (I cheated a few times) and I would take 1 minute to just reflect on each of the 5 things.  Guess what?  It was magical.

I put the list on my original blog with the goal of recording 3000 positive memories and experiences. I invited others to participate. It was beautiful how a few moments spent mining for gratefulness changed me and those around me.  That’s why I always hashtag “focus and take time”.

Daily we simply cannot “overcome” all the difficult people and encounters or inner feelings we meet. But we can use the law of substitution to shrink the present negative circumstances.  Just by creating this simple practice and teaching others how to do it got my is shift in gear. 5 little thoughts are amazing when you want to quickly move the energy in an otherwise negative room.  Or yourself.

Mining yesterday was easy. I took off my consultant hat and put down the laptop and toured a historic factory in upstate New York with my family. I found so many but here are just 5:

Construction workers waving hello

Huge red-orange Flowers

Meeting Matilde from France 9B2F09D8-D9ED-4F79-8BCF-6EBC533744AB

Groundhogs in the garden

Ice cream sandwiches by the fire truck

Try this. Focus and take time. Challenge your employees and teams and kids and spouse and self.  Who knows what might make tomorrow’s list? 

We pass treasures every single day. Be determined to see them. 

As a small biz owner, are you reluctant to tell your brand story on livestream?  Are you gripped with uncertainty at the suggestion of using IGTV, YouTube or creating edited video?  Do you get sweaty palmed when you think about scripting daily social media posts, your next blog, or  your “about me” page or bio?  No need. Helping you lose the negativity while finding your voice is what I do best. Get on my calendar for a free 20-minute catalyst session.  Together we can do this.  

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Introduce Your “Yes” And Your “No” To Each Other – They Make A Perfect Couple

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It’s pure and simple like grade school math. The old fashioned kind. Before common core and base 10. Just the basic method of rote memorization.  Flash cards and carrying the one. For every yes there is a corresponding no. Period. Point. Blank. We keep thinking that there must be a way around it, but there is none to be found. 

As a mompreneur with two businesses this formula sometimes gets in the way.  I get caught in the yes and yes syndrome. Or the no, but syndrome.  Both end super moms and super wives in a cliff hanger of, “how in the world I am going to do all of that?”

Especially when one of my kids is involved, all bets are off.  I don’t know about you, but I think we have a way of making the  impossible suddenly feel possible.  We do what we otherwise cannot do.  It’s yes and yes all the way.  That is until we can’t.  When we have to realize that one strong defiant yes does not always have to be married to another strong defiant yes.  More often that not, our strong yes must establish a courtship with a loving No, thank you.

For the last 3 months, my life has been a series of yes and yes.  Nothing too difficult that I couldn’t handle it, right?  Sure thing.  That is until I found myself sleeping in the park 4 miles from home because I was too tired to get there safely.  And then again a few weeks later, when I had to take a 20 minute nap, (relaxation music, essential oils and all) in the radiology parking lot across town.  Uh-oh…something is out of balance.

Almost 30 years ago, during a routine exam one of my doctors saw what they now know to be the sprinkles of CFS.  Chronic Fatigue Syndrome.  I didn’t have it, but I had the “factor”, whatever that meant.  I went on the hunt and became embroiled in natural practitioners and healthy eating.  Before long, positive thinking, affirmations and gratitude edged its way into my life and finally coaching and eventually leaving my day job to pursue more balance.  It was a long process, but now after 6 years, launching my confidence and positivity coaching business coupled with Mary Kay, things make more sense.  I know what I’m doing.   Sure thing.  That is until I get over tired and keep pushing.

But what about  kids?  That is a yes and yes proposition always, right?  Nope. In order to be our best to our everyone; hubbies, kids, career, etc. we have to allow yes to get into a relationship with no – date, get engaged, and eventually marry.  It is only once we embrace the truth that saying yes to any single thing is saying no to something else, that balance even comes into view.IMG_2652

Take last night as an example.  Darling daughter had her third doctor appointment in 2 days and it just so happened to be in the middle of the height of traffic and over an hour away.  Hubby would be at worship with my son so that meant I would go and hold down the fort.  Pull my weight.  Do my share.  In the words of Nike, “Just Do It”.  Except in reality it wasn’t in me.  The sprinkle was becoming a wave last evening and I needed to slow down to a drastic halt and let the yes of her appointment become the exclusive one and only  lover of the no to my driving.  I didn’t see it, but dear husband did.  Because I’m a high creative, and I live in gratitude, I wrote this while I rode last night.

Tonight I watched a sunset while riding and felt sheer bliss. The rush hour traffic was slow-going and thick. We had an appointment that could not be missed. Stress had lifted a heavy hand as if it would never withdraw. But as I sat in the back seat all I felt was peace. 

Earlier in the day my soul love partner offered to cancel his plans and drive us. My immediate response was no.  His day had been equally challenging and as a wife I like doing my share. And I can handle it.  Tonight though would have been too much.  He knew before I did that saying yes and no must coexist.  They are the exact same value on a bill that needs to be paid on time.  Everytime. 

Tonight I was reminded that being a ‘super mom’ and ‘super wife’ has limits.

Positivity is not a substitute for waning power.  

Confidence does not trump Self-Care. 

Sometimes the most powerful thing you can do is sit behind the driver and watch the sun fall.

So there it is.  Yes and No in a beautiful relationship that each confident woman needs to embrace if she will slay the servant, wifey and career/momtrepreneur game.  I’m not yet asking you to run out and ask for loads of help.  That might be too jarring.  That kind of levelheadedness takes time!  But if it’s been far too long since you allowed yourself to receive a hand up, it’s time.  Just say Yes…and No.

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Are you a make it happen woman in public,  who is hiding behind a facade of confidence? Could you benefit from support around your mindset, body image, motivation and self-talk in private?  Are you ready to ease your way into releasing your negativity so your positivity can reign?  I’d love to help you up level your game.

Complete the questionnaire to apply for a free 20-minute strategy session with me.  http://bit.ly/Ready-now

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Coaching Website:  ChatoneMorrison.com

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Family Dialysis: Sign Me Up!

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Does this family look like yours?  One of the things I absolutely love about elephants is that they stick together.  They care for their young.  The protect and don’t mess around when predators try to infiltrate.  Sounds like you?  It definitely sounds like me.

Wondering how you can get close and stay close to your kids despite the difficulties of social media, negativity, peer pressure and way too little time with them?  Want to get less toxic?  Is it time for you to rediscover why you procreated and get back to basics?

It’s time for Family Dialysis.  This series started here on my blog but has now moved to The Confidence Catalyst Academy.  Each month or so there is a new video with tips and tricks for the family along with fun ideas for connection.  Subscribe to my youtube channel Chatone Morrison YouTube to be notified of any video posted to my site and for a preview of Family Dialysis.

If you are looking for more for your family try checking this out.  It’s bigger than a breadbox but smaller than an elephant – just the right size for your tribe!

For more information, contact: hello@chatonemorrison.com.

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Are you a make it happen woman in public, who sometimes hides  behind a facade of confidence? Could you benefit from support around your mindset, body image, motivation and self-talk in private?  Are you ready to ease your way into releasing your negativity so your positivity can reign?  I’d love to help you up level your game.

Complete the questionnaire to apply for a free 20-minute strategy session with me.  http://bit.ly/Ready-now

Social Media
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Coaching Website:  ChatoneMorrison.com

Facebook:
@chatonemorrisonconsulting
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What Moment Will You Cherish?

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Cherishing My Moments. Because “one day it could be otherwise”.

For the last several days I’ve been in Puerto Plata, Dominican Republic without my family. For someone else that might seem normal enough, but that just means they haven’t met me yet. Traveling? Check! Traveling internationally? Check! Traveling internationally without my husband? That would be an automatic no for me.

However we had an issue with our kids passports; I had no choice. I needed to come and welcome our family and guests, all the while praying hubby could get 24 hour passport renewal without me being in the room. DO NOT…I REPEAT…DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME!!

(I will save the details for another blog once I can find the humor in it. That hasn’t happened yet! But to whet your appetite It includes the following: nine school children who wouldn’t get out of the street, an irate customer care agent who should hand in her resignation NOW, a monsoon, 15 hours of hunger, struggling up a steep cobblestone hill on a golf cart with no windshield through the previously mentioned monsoon, 4 defunct Internet cafes, a lawyer who can no longer hold his own pen but has the notary stamp, holding back the traffic of 489 aggressive motorcycle drivers, to run through the traffic and that blasted monsoon and at least one donkey.)

Now that my family is here I am once again reminded why it’s so important to authentically focus and take time. To slow down and be present. To cherish the moment. To know that: “one day it could all be otherwise”. To learn more about this concept, check out the last episode of, The Sunday Corner™, on YouTube: bit.ly/ChatoneYT

Last night we celebrated with a special dinner. And while this is not a restaurant review it just might make you hungry to visit the DR and come to this fabulous spot.

Travel with me….

We dined at at “Saffron”, a private restaurant here in Puerto Plata. How it lived up to its name!!

Fresh healing herbs infused into every bite. Yes, the food was amazing. Mediterranean hot and spicy lentil and root vegetable soup, smooth hummus and eggplant purée in tiny white bowls served alongside pickled carrots and beets and thick pita bread straight from the oven. The tender roasted lamb chops the size of beef ribs, the chicken tangine arrived at the table atop pearl potatoes, tiny okra and in a sauce with the perfect bite. All of this feast paired with a delectable deep red wine, then finished with crispy phyllo stuffed with apricots and drizzled with warm honey. We were directly at the ocean in a evening so dark, we could hear the surf and waves and the song of night birds, but see nothing. Not even the sand. It was truly a gorgeous experience.

And yet it became pale because I was in the midst of cherishing that my “forever boyfriend” had finally arrived. Mark Morrison is better than the best dinner in the best location in the best part of the most beautiful island. I have cherished him since I was 14 years old. I want to continue.

When you stop to focus and take time, you notice all the tiny hints of moments to cherish and enjoy.

Your turn…

Chatone Morrison ©2017

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Are you a make it happen woman in public, need who is hiding behind a facade of confidence? Could you benefit from support around your mindset, body image, motivation and self-talk in private?  Are you ready to ease your way into releasing your negativity so your positivity can reign?  I’d love to help you up level your game.

Complete the questionnaire to apply for a free 20-minute strategy session with me.  http://bit.ly/Ready-now

Social Media
https://linktr.ee/realprincessofpositivity

Coaching Website:  ChatoneMorrison.com

Facebook:
@chatonemorrisonconsulting
@princessofpositivity

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Periscope/Pinterest/Twitter:  ChatoneMorrison

Just DANCE: 5 Tips to Dial Down The Negativity

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Something that is omnipresent in our lives and never seems to go anyplace is negativity.  From children all the way through adulthood negativity breeds like dandelions and there is no fertilizer strong enough to tame it.   External negativity goes through your ears and eyes and straight to your heart.  Worse still is internal negativity.  It causes self-esteem to dip and drop, confidence to stagnate and drown you in the dreaded feelings of “not good enough“.

Does this sound like you?  In the morning, do you jump up ready to go, feeling like a “day slayer” ready to make it happen and then get blindsided by the first person you see outside of your  bedroom with their negative mindset and attitudes?  pablo-varela-311608Or perhaps it happens to you before you even leave the bedroom!  Between the shower, the closet and the vanity mirror, do you sometimes bring the claws out?  Are you your best friend when you start your day?  Or if you were to be judged by the things you say under your breath would someone deem you the enemy?

If you answered yes, should you be alarmed?  Straight talk?  Yes.  At least somewhat.  Since the negativity is alive and well and out of your control from the outside, it is really important that you do what you can to protect yourself on the inside by simply dialing down the negativity.  

Dance Negativity Away

When a dancer is in the zone there is no room for negativity.  The art and practice of moving chases it away.  So how can you embrace some of that for your life?  Can you take up the tango or the waltz?  There is a distinct possibility that might actually work.  But instead of that, try this instead.

  1. Define.  What are the negative dominant thoughts that you experience each day?  If you define and acknowledge them they are easier to compartmentalize.
  2. Abbreviate.  After you define and acknowledge what’s eating at you most, you are at a crossroads.  Will you continue to give these thoughts a home?  Or will you send them packing.  It’s pretty hard to never think something that you have become accustomed to thinking every day.  But can you shorten the time that you allow those thoughts to dominate?  
  3. Nullify Untruth. Did you ever notice that sometimes you are completely lying about what is going on in your life?  Statements like:  “I’m so…” or “I never will…” or “I’m not…”, need to be nullified and neutralized.  Cancel them out before they take root.  They are simply too broadly stroked.  When you find yourself telling lies, just stop.  Not cute!dance 1aricka-lewis-208111
  4. Challenge.  What happens after you nullify the blatant untrue statements but you are still left with a negative ball of threads and you are not sure what to do?  That is when great questions come into play.  Here are a couple I use in coaching:
    •  What evidence do you have to prove this statement?
    • Give 5 examples of when that was true in the past 90 days.
    • Give 5 examples of when that was completely untrue in the past 90 days.
    • Who told you this last?  On a scale of 1-5 with 5 being highest, how does this person rate on the scale of importance with you?
  5. Energize.  The most effective part of Dancing to Dial Down Negativity is the adopt more positive energy.  Doing it alone is extremely difficult.  It takes effort, time, investment and a willingness to switch up the comfort of the uncomfortable.  Reading elevated material, listening to inspirational podcasts,  and changing your tribe all helps.  By far, working with a coach or consultant will quicken the pace of  your transition to releasing your negativity and allowing positivity to reign.  When you are able to actually hear back what you are saying  life changes life changing how differently your words sound when they are repeated back to you.  Like a radio at one time tuned to static, then moved to the right station, suddenly you hear the low energetic vibration, and you want to change it.  That want is facilitated by someone who has your best interests at heart.  david-charles-schuett-363769

Since external negativity has a constant foot in the door, what can you do to limit the time you spend with internal negativity?  Could you dial it back this week? Which of the above 5 resonates enough to make you want to dance?  

Find one.  Put on your favorite tunes.  Kick up your heels.  And dance!

 

 

 

Chatone Morrison ©2017

Are you a make it happen woman in public, in need of support around your mindset, image, motivation and self-talk in private?  Are you ready to ease your way into releasing your negativity so your positivity can reign?  I’d love to support you.  Complete the questionnaire to apply for a free 20-minute strategy session with me. 

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For More on This Topic – Catch the Latest Episode of The Sunday Corner© Show on YouTube:  

Visit The Sunday Corner Here

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Coaching Website:  ChatoneMorrison.com

Facebook:

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Sarah Cervantes
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David Charles Schuett

Nothing Compares To You

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NOTHING COMPARES TO YOU…BELIEVE IT!

When is the last time you felt that nothing compared to you?  You know that feeling when you are “sitting pretty” without even trying?  When you are in the midst of the best you, doing the things that make you feel great from the inside out?  If it has been a while, this blog is just for you.  If you can’t remember when,  you may have fallen victim to someone else’s hype. If you can’t remember,  it’s  been way too long.  

Guess what?   Contrary  to popular belief…nothing compares to you.   It wouldn’t sting so badly if this statement weren’t true.  But it is true.  Your specialness precedes you, even when you don’t see it.

Why You Don’t See It

You don’t see where you don’t look.  As women we are oftentimes looking for the good in everyone around us.  It becomes our singular job to uplift, empower, encourage and nurture.  The family, the job, the school, where we volunteer, all get our best.  They may or may not give us compensatory thanks.  We are literally living our specialness and giving it away simultaneously, so much so that we personally miss it altogether.  Search.  Look deeper.  It’s still there.

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Your standards of  “best you” are not quite right.  you using to compare your Have you ever looked in a old,  cloudy or cracked mirror?  How did you look?  Even if you could make out all your features, would you trust that mirror to put on your makeup?  Do your hair for an evening out?  Dress yourself?  What might the chances be for you to make an error in judgement and totally miss it?  Fairly high, right?  

How often are your standards set by you instead of strangers?   When an important path is set by someone who doesn’t know how unique and lovely you are, you will never feel that you measure up.  Period.  Take a look at your mirror.  If it can be cleaned up, do it.  If it needs replacing, throw it away and start again.

La, La, La…I Can’t Hear You!

Sound like a child you know?  This is a fan favorite with small children.  They tune out cellphone-andrik-langfield-petrides-348253what they don’t want to hear.  Have you taken on this childlike behavior?  Is it wrecking havoc on your self-esteem and confidence?  You can get so busy hearing what people you don’t know are whispering to you that you don’t hear what those who know and love you are screaming.  This social media monster is in a constant chase for our hearts.  It’s a necessary evil that can replace the human interaction in our lives if we let it.  Next stop?  No longer listening to important people who know you, love you, understand where you have been and where you are going.  Hand over ears and eyes, you make others out to be wrong; no longer believing the truth.  It’s gradual and insidious and happens way too often! It’s annoying when kids do it.  (Newsflash:  It’s annoying when adults do it too!)

What Can You Do?

  1. If you nurture others; nurture yourself too.  Give away some of your best self, and keep some for yourself.  It’s easier said than done, so practice is needed.  
  2. Take a good look at your mirror.  If the standards you are working with no longer fit you make a change.  Evolve them. Remove them.  You will not stay the same woman, especially as you gain more life experience (age/wisdom, etc).  Expect the metamorphosis and accept it for what it is . . . Something Wonderful. 
  3. Unless you are a very tall, feathery and fast bird running on the plain, you can no longer use ostrich-like habits to excuse away who you are.  Rejecting reality does not change it.  When others acknowledge you, it is a blessing.  Develop your listening and appreciation skills.  Very few people have the desire to flatter you for no reason.  Listen.  You just might hear something great.

The late artist Prince said it best:  Nothing compares to you.   However, if you don’t allow yourself to go to your own party, the party will go on without you.  Since it’s being thrown in your honor, you might as well enjoy it.  

Chatone Morrison ©2017

Are you a make it happen woman in public, in need of support around your mindset, image, motivation and self-talk in private?  Are you ready to ease your way into releasing your negativity so your positivity can reign?  I’d love to support you.  Complete the questionnaire to apply for a free 20-minute strategy session with me. 

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Don’t Miss The Latest Episode of The Sunday Corner Show on YouTube:  

Visit The Sunday Corner Here

Social Media

https://linktr.ee/realprincessofpositivity

Coaching Website:  ChatoneMorrison.com

Facebook:

@chatonemorrisonconsulting

@princessofpositivity

Instagram:  @realprincessofpositivity

Periscope/Pinterest/Twitter:  ChatoneMorrison

All photos courtesy of Unsplash.com

Are You Setting Your Fire With Wet Wood?

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Do you have an autumn ritual?  Something that automatically makes your mind turn to red and gold leaves and the shedding of trees?  For our family that means camping.  Although  we won’t be able to fit it into our October schedule, we will no doubt spend time on our patio, enjoying a crisp, dusky evening, making s’mores around the fire pit, telling stories, watching the release of the beautiful, glowing energy.

Speaking of stories, which ones have you been telling yourself lately?  What renewal are you in the process of experiencing?  As I mentioned the other day in a blog post here, this time of year has become the new starting point for so many folks.  Autumn truly is the “New Black”.  For me, it’s all about writing more, meeting new people in both my coaching and Mary Kay business, and working a revised, more robust schedule for my Deaf ministry.   bulb idea riccardo-annandale-140624

Each of us has the unique privilege of having a dream, an idea, a mission, some specialness that we want to bring to fruition.  To do it well, you need to ignite a “fire” in your spirit to make it happen.  And no matter how excited you might be about your big idea, without the elements of fire behind you to make it happen, well it won’t happen.

Setting fire to your idea, your dream without the strength of the right elements is like setting a fire with wet wood.  It will smolder and smoke, but never get to a full burn.  The right stuff is missing; the dampness is killing the energy!   But how can you know what the right stuff is, and how do you get it?

In many ways it’s simple.  It’s all about strength.  The cool thing about this strength is that you can adopt it.  Grow it.  Develop it.  Evolve into it.  It’s not about pushing or prodding.  It’s about asking the right questions.fire timothy-meinberg-206976

My specialty is about helping women ask the right questions of themselves so they can learn how to release negativity, let positivity reign, and set a fire within to get things moving in the right direction.  Is that your journey?  Are you ready to start?  Be sure to check out this past week’s Sunday Corner™ video.  You can get so much done when you turn up your flame!

Chatone Morrison ©2017

Ready to get your positive energy in check?  Looking to clean up your self-talk, create a personal affirmation plan or ease your way into releasing your negativity so your positivity can reign?  Complete the questionnaire for a free coaching strategy session.

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Don’t Miss The Weekly Sunday Corner Show on YouTube:  Bit.ly/ChatoneYT

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https://linktr.ee/realprincessofpositivity

Coaching Website:  ChatoneMorrison.com

Facebook:

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@princessofpositivity

@chatonemorrisonMK

Instagram:  @realprincessofpositivity

Periscope/Pinterest/Twitter:  ChatoneMorrison

Interested in starting your own business?  Let’s set up a marketing chat. chatonemorrison@marykay.com

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