After Suffering a Great Loss: 7 Strategies for Grieving With Grace


by Chatone Morrison

Even if you haven’t recently suffered a great loss, the COVID-19 virus has left us all in a chronic state of collective grieving. I have been overwhelmed with Zoom memorial services. Saying goodbye has become harder than ever. We see each other crying on the screen, but hear nothing because we are muted. We receive (SOS) support on social. Virtual hearts and hugs are all we have, but they are not as powerful as the real thing. We are missing people without being able to say goodbye. The loss is no less real, and the sting is more intense.

When I take on the challenging assignment of creating an obituary or interviewing family members for a life story for a funeral service program or video, this is how I do it. In my writing workshops, I call this “Write & Release”, or “Write & Remember”. It’s a palate cleanser, or a palate prompter, depending on what is needed. When you lose someone you cherish, it’s a nice way to remember, so it’s just a little easier.

In this moment of mass and personal loss, over and over, there is a need to slow down, stop, and find gentle ways to hold onto the past, and still keep going forward, all without breaking, and finding the blessings along the way. It’s possible. Read on.

Here are my 7 Strategies for Grieving With Grace. And this is how I assist my grieving clients through the difficult charge of creating a life memorial or obituary.


This “Write & Remember” journey can be recorded in a journal or voiced and later transcribed. Try to do this soon after you lose someone precious to you. Of course, depending on the closeness of the relationship, you may need to allow some time to pass, and that is OK. This all about adding grace and ease and helping your memories to flow. So, even if you are able to do just one thing, it will make an impact.

  1. Memory List. Create a list of memories shared with your lost loved one. This memory list can be written in a journal or spoken and recorded.
  2. Photographs. Gather all the hard copy photos. Make copies as needed. Retrieve digital photos and social media postings. Save on an external drive or cloud source. Add favorites to the journal.
  3. Special Conversations. Try to recall the most special conversation shared with your lost loved one. Do not replay the worst one over and over; it’s easy to do that. Find the best one. Write it down as you remember it. Don’t interpret. Just write.
  4. Unique List. List down as many unique, funny, quirky, and memorable things you can about your special person. Start with 10-15, and keep going, adding as many as you can recall.
  5. Audio & Video. Save a copy of their voice or a video. If you don’t personally have one, you can screen record from their social media to your smart device. Their exact voice is a legacy worth remembering and sharing. Hint: If someone you know is elderly, chronically ill, or close to death, please get this recording as soon a possible.
  6. Nickname. Write down their pet name for you and your pet name for them. (This is not the time to dwell on the negative nicknames you might have accepted.) Think back to the ones that were personal and loving and just between you two. Yes, there may be a few silly and embarrassing ones. At times, you might rolled your eyes by what you answered to, but it’s a part of a life you shared. Remember it.
  7. Talk. Talk it out. Share your personal discoveries and your journey and grief. There is nothing worse than grieving alone. To grieve with grace and find the blessing in your loss, you have to do it together.

With these steps you can gain grace and ease your way into the grieving process with your memories and your mindset intact. What do you do now?

Keep your journal close. As friends and family share their memories, add to it. When you want to talk to the person you loved and lost, pull it out and read it. It will make a difference.


Chatone Morrison is the Princess of Positivity® . Content Strategist & Confidence Coach. Gifted Writer Creating Print & Video Content that Raises Confidence, Positivity, & Energy in Corporate Women and Business Owners. Self-Talk Shifter. Motivation Elevator.  Catalyst.

Specializing in content creation, confidence coaching, consulting and delivery strategy for life and health coaches, Chatone is the owner of Chatone Morrison Consulting.  As a highly creative, high energy, heart-led, coach, consultant, mentor, leader, speaker and author, Chatone is absolutely passionate about helping her clients to script their unique stories, know their niche and find their voice, and systematize their message.  Chatone believes that you can release negativity so positivity can reign in your brain and in your business.  To work with Chatone, go to bit.ly/contentkickstartcall or visit chatonemorrison.com

Confident Content Tuesday: Ready To “Cook Up” Some Great Content? Perfection is NOT Required!

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Today’s Confident Content Tuesday Tip was delivered via Facebook live stream   (Access Today’s Facebook Livewhile I made gluten-free banana-nut muffins.  Simultaneously.  🙌 Am I proud when I successfully do double duty?  Sure!  But what I love most is that I give myself permission to make mistakes and to keep going.  The Confident Content Tip of the Day is all about that.

**  Perfection Is NOT Required **

If you like cooking as much as I do, you learn your way around the kitchen and during all the trial and error you learn the strangest things, for example, what you initially think is a tragedy is often found totally delicious by other people.  It’s similar with your content delivery.  Especially as a coach, consultant, artist, or other high creative being, when you are delivering the “gift of you”, perfection rears it’s ugly head way too often.  So just think, what would you do if you were in the kitchen and wanted to serve up something tasty even if you had a little bit of doubt?  Here’s 5 things that will help in the kitchen, in life and definitely in the business of creating your content.

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5 Keys to Confident Content (That Work In The Kitchen Too!)

  1. Prepare for your niche.  Ever had a dinner party and invited guests who adhere to special diets?  You try to accommodate, right? You wouldn’t cook Shrimp Alfredo for someone with a shellfish allergy and is gluten-free.   You would know what they needed and then what they needed and then give it to them.  It’s the same with your content.  Know your audience and give them exactly what they need.  They are not looking for perfection, but consistently tasty prepared just for them.
  2. Use what you have on hand.  Your pantry is chock full of goodies and you can create something great from there even in a pinch.  With your skills, talents, education, passion and gifts, it’s the exact same thing.  Don’t try to cook from someone else’s kitchen – yours is way more than good enough!
  3. Know the art of substitution. There is no sense lamenting over not having enough oil when you can usually exchange equal amounts of applesauce while cutting  calories but keeping the moisture and even adding a bit of flavor.  In your content if something is working, change it.  One platform isn’t performing, try a different one. A particular CTA doesn’t engage, move on.  Getting it right may take a couple tries but in the meantime you are learning what works best and you can never go wrong with that lesson.IMG_5809
  4.  Be flexible.  The toothpick test doesn’t always come out clean after 45 minutes on a 350 oven.  That’s life.   If you stubbornly (perfectly) follow the recipe at all costs, you might end up with something half-baked and inedible.  Especially when you are delivering your content on live stream realize that a few curve balls might come your way.  You might have the notes, nerve and the notion but life will happen!  Today during my Facebook livestream I realized that there was gluten-free flour on my, um, let’s just say right upper torso area….  I had to pivot in the moment.  My allergies kicked up smack dab in the middle of chatting and stirring.  Imagine if perfection got the best of me and I abruptly ended.  Not a good look.  But it’s spring and it happens, so I walked off camera, took care of my runny nose and got right back to the recipe of my content.  You can do just the same.  Be Flexible and go with it.  
  5. Questions are your ally. I think the reason women love  Pinterest so much is because we often come from families that don’t cook and we want an ally, a tribe.  We need to know that someone is out there that has done it too and can tell us how to do it.  But then if our banana nut muffins don’t turn out just like the picture we are bummed out.  You don’t have to respond that way if you don’t want to.  Realize that your niche market/ideal customer has questions too.  She is looking for a “recipe” for her problem and you have the answer.  What you know and will share is more than what she has.  Perfection is never placed in a search engine.  Ask what she needs.  Check your recipe to make sure you will deliver it and start consistently cooking and delivering your content!

Here’s the gem I want you to take away:  Perfection is not needed.   You are ready and should not delay another day waiting.  If I can help, let’s schedule a strategy session.  In the meantime:

Be Authentic.  Be Brilliant.  Be The Catalyst.

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©2019


Chatone Morrison is the Princess of Positivity® . Content Strategist & Confidence Coach. Gifted Writer Creating Print & Video Content that Raises Confidence, Positivity, & Energy in Corporate Women and Business Owners. Self-Talk Shifter. Motivation Elevator.  Catalyst.

Specializing in content creation, confidence coaching, consulting and strategy for women-owned small businesses, Chatone is the owner of Chatone Morrison Consulting.  As a highly creative, high energy, heart-led, coach, consultant, mentor, leader, speaker and author, Chatone is absolutely passionate about helping her clients to script their unique brand story, know their niche and find their voice, systematize their message and move past the negativity so they can confidently sell their services on and off-line.  She believes that you can absolutely release negativity so positivity can reign in your brain and in your business. To work with Chatone, go to bit.ly/contentkickstartcall or visit chatonemorrison.com

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