Getting There Without Getting Stuck

When is the last time you got Stuck?  It’s a yucky feeling, right?  Trust me, I’ve been there!  There are many reasons for getting Stuck.  Unfortunately it’s a real place.   An actual location on the map, and for one reason or another, our internal GPS thinks Stuck is true North.  There are no road signs or mile markers showing that you are approaching “Stucksville” (borrowed from my Daddy, the late, great Linwood Curley.)  It’s hidden between the crevices of our busy-ness, uncertainty and confusion.  Stuck is where we end up getting, when “There” is elusive.  So where is “There”? 

  1. Where do you want to go?  You have to set your destination with intention, if you want to avoid getting get Stuck.  Is it a promotion at work?  A new level in your MLM business?  Is it a different dress size or a completed marathon?  Are you after a more peaceful relationship with your teenage son or middle school daughter?  Would you like to write a book or start a blog or create a painting?  Does getting along with your elderly mom resonate with you?  Or do you see yourself getting your financial future in order?  Where are you wanting to go?  The destination is not the point.  You get permission to set that.  So take a few days and set a goal to where you want to be.  Because where is never the issue.  It’s in the why and how that Stuck takes over.
  2. Why is this important?  Why is always a toughie.  Why questions you and wants to know right away.  Why shows you absolutely no mercy.  and when you cannot figure out your Why in any and every given situation, Stuck is sure to ensue.  Why?  (See, I’m not even kidding on this!)  Because without the answer of Why there is no drive.  No motive.  No fire.  No energy.  And absolutely No Positivity.  It’s as if a “No Trespassing” sign were nailed over the destination to your goal.  Even if you attempt to tread lightly in the direction of your goal, without the answer to Why…you will very likely call the cops on your very own self.  You won’t believe you belong there, so you arrest yourself.  Yep, it’s not a pretty sight.  Imagine you holding yourself with your hands behind your back…Miranda rights being read…head bowed as you get in the police car and get dragged further and further away from your dreams.  Just figure this one out and you will spare yourself this dramatic scene.  Now all you have to think about is How – and that is the easiest one of all!
  3. How are you getting there?  OK, so I was teasing just a bit.  How has its challenges but nothing like Why.  How is challenging simply because there are so many different ways to do what you want.  And if you have already struggled with Why, chances are the How you will reach your destination without getting Stuck is going to take time.  The funny thing is, no matter what the sense of urgency is, time is never really an issue.  In this day and time we are beings that rush.  We are working to cram as much life in as we can.  Period.  So the best scenario is to take the needed time (not too much time, lest Stuck make an ugly appearance) and make the best decisions you can.  Want to lose weight?  How does it make you feel to work alone?  Would a food or health coach make sense?  Do you like groups?  How do you feel about the gym?  Would you prefer to run on the street or the treadmill?  How do you feel about trainers?  Get what I’m saying?  Each of these choices will most likely get you to your destination.  Taking the time to determine in positivity how you will get there, is a cornerstone to  arriving with minimal detours, roadblock, u-turns and avoiding “Stucksville”.  

What NOT To Do

  1. Get overly busy.  
  2. Belittle yourself.
  3. Forget to sew into self-worth.  
  4. Take action without thought or based on someone else’s agenda.

What TO Do

  1. Program your GPS Where you want to go according to your highest intentions.
  2. Discover your Why.  
  3. Examine How you want to get there.
  4. Pick only one mode of transportation at a time.

Along your many journeys and adventures this year, don’t visit Stucksville.  Instead grab your most colorful push-pins and put them into the Destination of your Dreams and enjoy the ride!

Chatone Morrison – 2/13/17

 

blue-hat-cbm

Connect with me!

Weekly Sunday Corner Show on YouTube:  Bit.ly/ChatoneYT

For Coaching Information:  ChatoneMorrison.com

Facebook Coaching/Consulting:  @chatonemorrisonconsulting

Facebook Mary Kay:  @chatonemorrisonMK

Shop Mary Kay:  marykay.com/chatonemorrison

Periscope/Instagram/Pinterest/Twitter:  Chatone Morrison

 

Excuse Me…May I Offer You A Hankie? Three Tips to Squash the Common Cough.

hankieStrange question indeed.  But everyday we encounter people that need a hankie.  The back of their hand.  The crook of their arm.  A napkin.  A tissue.  A turn of the head.  Anything to assist them from coughing all over you.  You know what I’m saying!  You’ve been the victim probably in the last few hours of someone coughing in your direction, not turning their head, ignoring the sputum that is dropping everywhere!tissues

Negative, emotional coughing, is just as contagious as an actual virus.  It’s prevalent to epidemic proportions.  In the family it starts as young as early school age children.  The negative energy is flowing and causing stagnation in ever area of our lives.  It’s as hard to combat as a super bug.  And just like those bugs, there are few if any external medicines that will do the ultimate trick.  The prescription is usually something like:  Rest.  Fluids.  Disinfect your environment so you don’t contaminate the family.

Do the same principles apply when someone has a chronic cough?  A super bug of the spirit?  Is there a way to avoid catching the epidemic?!

The good news?  Yes!  You absolutely can.  The other good news?  It’s the same formula as for a regular cough.  But be careful . . . Chronic Coughers are not easily shaken!

Three Tips To Squash The Common Cough

  1. Take a Break.  stopIf you are constantly bombarded with the negative drama of others, their sad stories, their woe-is-me existence, or their tales of victimization you will eventually catch the Common Cough.  So take a break.  It’s easy to see who these folks are in your life; when you see their name on your phone or email, a little sigh escapes your lips.  That “sigh” is your sign!  Give yourself permission to limit time with this individual.  Sometimes you know how much you immunity can take, and other times you don’t know until you get home and you are coughing too!  So instead of that, make a decision to honor your boundaries.  You deserve to be in the best health possible.  (In another blog or video I will jump into what happens when the cough resides in the house with you!  Stayed Tuned!!)
  2. Fluids.  Fluids lubricate the system.  Fluids assist things to get and stay moving.  Instead of the dryness of the throat, just a little fluid eases everything.  The same is true in dealing with emotionally negative people.  The fluid that is most readily available, but sometimes hard to muster is kindness, love, and understanding, and this takes time.  Wait!  Doesn’t that contradict “taking a break”? fluids Not exactly.  If you want to have the most positive experience possible, there has to be a fair amount of “benefit of the doubt”.  Everyone deserves that.  In practical terms this means you might have infrequent but kind communications with this person.  Especially in the workplace or in closer relationships.  Would it really hurt to acknowledge this person, perhaps offering them a listening ear every now and again?  Could you offer them a hankie?  Perhaps having a good word for them?  Even though it may not seem to make a dent, it will make a difference.  If not for them, it will for you.  If will create an ease based on putting someone else first, even just for a little while.
  3. Disinfect the Environment. There is a really good reason why frequent hand washing is recommended when we are sick.  It prevents that spread of germs.  Does this hold true with negative, emotional coughing too?  Yes!  lysolTo help protect yourself from catching the cough, simply clean up!  Don’t leave the negativity to fester in your mind.  Replace it with positive recordings.  Read books that build.  Post affirmations in your surroundings.  Use uplifting music to tune it out.  Light a candle.  Burn some incense.  Spritz essential oils.  Journal.  All of these are like disinfectants for the mind.  Protect yourself and prevent the spread of negative energy!

Keeping a positive healthy mind is pretty easy.  With awareness and a few quick strategies you can steer clear of the Common Cough.

Chatone Morrison – 1/17/17

blue-hat-cbm

Connect with me!

Weekly Sunday Corner Show on YouTube:  Bit.ly/ChatoneYT

For Coaching Information:  ChatoneMorrison.com

Facebook Coaching/Consulting:  @chatonemorrisonconsulting


Facebook Mary Kay:  @chatonemorrisonMK

Shop Mary Kay:  marykay.com/chatonemorrison

Periscope/Instagram/Pinterest/Twitter:  Chatone Morrison

 

Four Ways to Know You Have Fallen And Can’t Get Up & What To Do About It

screen-shot-2017-01-10-at-2-20-45-amWhat is UP for you?  For me UP is Unapologetic and Positive.  Does it seem like you have fallen and can’t get UP?  

Is the house too loud?  Does the cellphone never stop ringing?  Is your work cafeteria lady against you, only giving you the heel of the bread?  Then after you get the butts of the bread, are there  no empty tables for you?  Perhaps you are married.    You have three children.  But are there also 8 neighbors, 5 sisters, 4 parents, two cats, 1 dog, and about 67 people at work, that all need you?  Seems like you are surrounded; like “come out with you hands up, and we won’t shoot”, surrounded. Your answer is yes…always yes.  And you wake feeling burnt out and tired more often than ever before.  You would love to have just a little quiet.  But it seems to come less and less frequently.  Yikes!!!

How does a woman today navigate all the required highways still stay relatively sane and in her positive right mind?  Who reprogrammed the GPS so that it started driving you down instead of UP?  

The simple answer my friend…you did!  You did it in the name of progress.  Of love.  Of caring.  Of doing.  And now you are stuck in a negative rut.  But not to worry, I just might have a teeny tiny plan that you can implement today.  As in right now.  Right this very minute.  Why be stuck in the name of progress?

Our activities and choices  used to be like painting a wall.  You would look at paint chips, take them home, put them on the wall to try them out, then pick the one that was best suited for your room.  You threw out the rest because they didn’t fit.  You might have liked them but you made a best choice decision.  Now it seems that the way to “paint a life” is to throw various paints from a distance on a small wall, during a drive by, and then get surprised and dismayed when a masterpiece doesn’t appear.  

It doesn’t work. Women can’t do it all and feel 100% happy.  We can’t outsource it all and feel 100% connected.  We all want to feel positive and determined about the decisions we are currently making and living, yet we continue to fall, get stuck and can’t get UP!

But I’m not stuck!  I’m haven’t been in a rut since I had that bob cut with bangs!  Not me!  I’m great!  

Is that the best way to handle this?  Don’t get me wrong, I’m all about positive thinking.  But if it’s based on nothing but a list of lose ideas grabbed from someone else’s playbook – it won’t work!

How to Know If You Have “Fallen and Can’t Get UP?

No matter what your social media pictures and posts say, it’s time to face the truth.  Let’s get you crawling, walking and finally running, all int he next few weeks!  Ready.  Get Set.  Go!

Self-Assessment

  1. Do you feel an overall loss of energy or enthusiasm about work or home life?  Especially things that you use to enjoy?
  2. Do you often feel as if you are losing control when trying to get everything done?
  3. Has negative thinking or self-demeaning thoughts become commonplace?
  4. Are you demotivated to eat right, exercise, take care of basic necessities?

Which of these resonates with you?  Even just one can indicate that you may be about to hit the floor.  

Creating An Action Plan

  1. Isolate and Identify The Problem.  Where are the demands coming from?  Is it work or home?  Is it your spouse or your kids?  Is it your weight or your health? (Notice that these are different!)  Which weighs heaviest on your energy? Make a short list, no more than 3 items to start.  More than that will cause great overwhelm.  You can always  come back and do this step again.
  2. Seek Clarity & Seek Solutions.  You have your list in hand and it’s time to get clear on what and how you want to change.  Working with a coach at this point is excellent because as a neutral 3rd party they are invested in your success, not in the specific way you get there.  (For information about working with a coach, see my website:  chatonemorrison.com)  Not yet ready to work with a coach? Creating a vision board (poster board, pictures/words from magazines, glue stick are all you need) can help with steps 1 and 2  at the same time. Sometimes with so much crowding you need to allow a space for your mind to get clear and feel free.  While moving to a deserted island by yourself with no one but a personal concierge to bring you Mai Tais all day and night, while you seek clarity, probably isn’t an option, I’d bet a 2-hour window to play “hide and seek” with  yourself is quite doable. Never created one before?  Hit me up in the comments below and I can give you some quick suggestions.
  3. P.S:  Make One “PDC” Each Day.  Your quest for “Personal Space” and “Personal Slow-Down” will take time.  So along the way it’s vital to have a daily “PDC”.  Permission Driven Choices are an amazing way to start feeling whole again. It could be as small as getting the cup of coffee you want and taking 5 minutes to drink it while looking out the window.  It could be leaving your office and sitting outside in your car and screaming away the stress…although make sure you don’t park too close to the building if you choose that one!  Back in the day when I was still at my corporate job, one of my PDCs was to simply stop “holding it”.  TMI…but true!  The point is to do one thing each and every day, that was formerly off limits.  Try it for a week.  Get your Power Back!
  4. Just Ask & Saying No.  As soon as you read this, think about something you want.  What would you love help with?  If you assertiveness volume was turned all the way up, what could you say?  Just Ask.  Say No. Do it.  No holding back.  Not ready to tell your boss to take his last minute deadline and throw it where the sun don’t shine? (I would not recommend; neither the most positive nor motivating thing to do!)  But could you ask for an extension?  Being asked again to be the only chaperone for the class trip, to make the cupcakes or be the pot luck coordinator for the next family get together, and also by the way, have it at your house?! Wrap your tongue around Saying No!  I guarantee if said with a twinkle in your eye and just the right amount of lift in your voice, 9 times out of 10, your assertiveness will be met with respect.  The best part is you get to feel  better… Quick!

The earth spins and so do our worlds.  Just like we cannot jump off the Earth, we also cannot slow everything down to suit our needs.  But you can start to reset your GPS to take short cuts and avoid traffic patterns that are roadblocks to your destination – POSITIVITY!

Chatone Morrison – 1/10/2017

cbm-princess-classic-thumb2

Connect with me!

For Coaching Information:  ChatoneMorrison.com

Facebook Coaching/Consulting:  @chatonemorrisonconsulting

YouTube:  Chatone Morrison Channel

Periscope/Instagram/Pinterest/Twitter:  Chatone Morrison

Facebook Mary Kay:  @chatonemorrisonMK

Featured Image Courtesy of Google Images & GabbinGirls

What Do You Need…A Dollar or A Dream?

cbm-pic-taker

“The poorest person is not one without a dollar, but one without a dream.”

This quote is often posted on Facebook and Twitter and yet it resonates deeply each and every time.  It’s not surprising.  Whether one lives in poverty or the penthouse, is a front office clerk, or corner office CEO, when dreams, aspirations, and visions reside within, there is energy for another day.  The simple truth is, the human happiness quotient is not based on outside things.  It is based on what is within.

The biggest challenge is not dream development or creation.  It’s keeping them alive when the light above them dims.  It’s remembering to take them out for intimate dates, even after being married to them for 20 years.  And as the quote insinuates, it’s in making sure that other goals don’t replace what’s really important.  Sometimes, our dreams don’t need more money – they need a place to lay their tired heads.

It’s true that some of our more “creative” ideas may have an expiration date based on timing or circumstances.  You may not be able to join the circus at 39 years old and perform as a trapeze artist,  but can you go to a TRX or Pilates class and learn to strength train while suspended – closing your eyes and imagining yourself in the big tent?  In other words, if you hold your dream tightly enough, and know the intrinsic worth for you alone, you will find a way to make the essence of it a reality.

The chances of me becoming a professional dancer now are slim, but no holds barre (pun intended), I am great and graceful when I’m in cardio dance classes…(well, theoretically…when my ankle is not swollen!)  For an hour I compassionately stroke the head of that tiny farfetched dream.  And guess what?  My positivity, energy, and happiness are always higher than before I started.

If you can make authenticity boil over, it is multi-faceted, brilliant, and far more valuable than the world’s most expensive diamond.

Ready to reinvigorate your dreams? Read on!

Discovery:

  • What dream of mine keeps coming back year after year?
  • What am I doing with it?
  • If I’m not doing enough, what can I do to inch toward that part of myself?
  • What’s the best thing that can happen if I simply go for it?
  • Why am I waiting?

No matter how thin or worn or frayed the edges become, put your dream in your pocket or your purse.  Sling it over your shoulder and carry at least one with you at all times.  Be open to taking it out and showing it off, like you would a picture of your daughter or son, or kitty or pup.  Don’t hide it and don’t run from it.  Remember, your dreams are not going anywhere.  Where ever you go, there they are, patiently waiting for you to take them out for a spin.

Don’t worry about the dollar – JUST DREAM!

Chatone Morrison – 11/24/2016

Connect with me!

Facebook Mary Kay:  @chatonemorrisonMK

Facebook Coaching/Consulting:  @chatonemorrisonconsulting

YouTube:  Chatone Morrison Channel

Periscope/Instagram/Pinterest/Twitter:  Chatone Morrison

Three Ways to Find Grace Even On the Craziest of Days

cbm-white-glasses

Chatone Morrison    “Princess of Positivity”

The painters came today.  Again.  They are neat.  Tidy.  They don’t play obnoxious music while they work.  They don’t even whistle.  They don’t curse or say misogynistic things to Katelin (my 14-year-old daughter).  They don’t leave food wrappers in the house or outside on the lawn.  They are great.  Really, really great.

The problem is there is a film of dust all over the house.  Despite the terribly noisy vacuum that is supposed to make the paint and dust spores disappear into the thin air…which is totally ironic because the air is so thick with dust it’s completely impossible to see if it’s even working!  But they are nice guys.  And they are neat.  I’m supposed to be happy.

Here’s the thing.  I can’t cook.  There is a 6 foot tall silk Ficus tree in my kitchen.  Oh, and the recliner, and the loveseat and my latest Mary Kay inventory boxes, and a science experiment, and 3 lamps.  The kitchen table is up against the island, the island is covered in the same film described above and did I mention there is no dinner?!

Junior is running through the house sliding on the dust residue, in between itching,  seems to have an allergic reaction to not being able to breathe…go figure.  And my girl is rolling her eyes so far into her head she just might be blind and no one told me.  The noise from the scraping and the vacuum and the ladders and 6 dudes, is deafening.  I cannot hear my thoughts.  In fact I might be slipping into the realm of the brain dead.  (OK, that might be over the top…but you know what I’m saying!)

Days like this come and we moms can sink into the pit of despair.  Little triggers all over the house and even though we are rocking it out, suddenly we don’t see it.  Suddenly eating a box of chocolate ice cream or a huge pot of spaghetti straight from the pot seems like a good idea.  But don’t do it.  Don’t believe the hype.  There is a better way.

  1. Go Outside – It’s fall here in Maryland and the days are super crisp and pretty.  If it’s crazy inside, go outside!  That’s simple right?  Duh…why didn’t you think of it?  You did!  You just didn’t do it.  We always know what we should do.  We are smart women.  Of course we know.  The problem is we don’t act.  We substitute a logical action for an intuitive one.  When it’s crazy inside, follow your gut.  Go Outside!
  2. Count – Yep.  Just count.  There is some neuroscience behind this one…but I don’t want to overwhelm you with my amazing expertise. (ha ha) Suffice it to say it’s like having your brain go outside for a moment.  The counting helps you redirect.  Center.  Get out of the crazy for just a moment.  Then you can focus on doing what you need.
  3. Just One Thing – Well the fun can’t last forever.  After you clear your mind outside;  then center your focus to unclutter your thoughts, it’s time to find one thing that will make a difference.  Perhaps that’s clearing off just one counter.  Or picking up the socks on the couch.  Or making a salad for dinner.  Or calling one client to do a little service check.  Or following up on one hot email.  It doesn’t really matter what you choose.  Just choose a good one so that you can feel the sense of accomplishment.

Honestly girlfriend, in the midst of the madness…in the middle of whatever crazy you have going on, just go with the simplest strategy to help you get through.  You already know that this day too shall pass.  Being graceful and easy on yourself as it does, is priceless.

Rock On Ladies!

Chatone Morrison – 11/16/2016

Connect with me!

Facebook:  @chatonemorrisonmk or @chatonemorrisonconsulting

YouTube:  Bit.ly/ChatoneYT

Looking for a Coach? Check me out at:  ChatoneMorrison.com